I used to think in my early twenties that I would either make a go of the world, let go of my black and white, good vs. bad thinking, get elbow deep into the muck of the world, or move to Vermont... read more here

It’s a Baby!

“It’s a Baby!”  I cried out in relief and joy when our first son made his appearance into the world almost 11 years ago.  We had decided not to find out his sex until birth, so I didn’t immediately know that tidbit, but I did know he was a baby and I was in absolute awe that one had just come out of me.

Maybe I’m dense, but on this my sixth birth I still couldn’t wrap my brain around how a new life could come from inside me and out into world.  ~G’s birth was fairly quick like it was for four of his older brothers (about 3 hours of active labor).  This time I opted for an epidural as a treat for the last last hour and a half of labor as well as the final push.  I was really tired all month and wanted to be a little less exhausted when I greeted this new little guy.  Without too much fuss he arrived, Kevin cut his umbilical cord, and there was ~G warm and new in my arms.

When we first found out about ~G’s Down syndrome I did intensive research for two weeks to find out what it all meant.  What I found was that Ds could mean many things, from heart defects and other health issues to a wide range of intellectual abilities.  All that information really didn’t tell me much till we met OUR little guy and  I knew I would love him (like all of our sons) for whomever he would be, so I stacked that info. away and went on with life.

I did however have a thirst to tell most everyone who commented on my pregnancy or asked if I knew the sex of the new baby that he was a boy and that he had Down syndrome.  I felt that by being upfront about it, the power it had to form his identity was taken away.

Kevin on the other hand hardly told anyone in the months before ~G was born.  He explained to me this past week that he didn’t want preconceived ideas of who our son was to skew his heart before he was able to meet him.

Really we were both preparing open hearts for our boy, though we went about it in very different ways.

On this the two week anniversary of ~G’s birth I thought I would write about him so far, now that he is here with us.

Here is our baby:

~G has sleepy faces, “I’m having a bad dream faces”, smiles, budda/drunk with milk faces, and yawns that look almost exactly like those of his brothers when they were infants (who themselves looked very similar to one another).  He has dark hair too like his brothers all did when they were born.

He is also distinctly himself:  he is a fantastic eater (by far the best of all the boys who were good eaters as infants), he has a big button “outie” which we discovered yesterday when his umbilical cord fell off, he sleeps lots, and when he cries he lets out one big siren like cry then is silent for 30-40 seconds and then lets out another piercing cry instead of steady wails, when he is hungry or needs changing.  ~G has a dimple on his left cheek, you see it especially when he eats.

When ~G is asleep he looks more or less just like his five older brothers did as infants.  When he is awake I see his almond shaped eyes with the nuchal fold I read about months ago.  His blue eyes appear quite dark (darker than his brothers were as infants and they all now have a shade of blue except 17 mo old ~O who has a sort of hazel eye color) and we wonder what color his will end up being.  He has wonderful quiet alert times where he looks around interested in the world.

We all love him.

Everyone enjoys holding him, except 6 year old ~C who is happy to sit beside me as I hold ~G and he looks on.  ~O at 17 months loves to take off ~G’s hat so he can snuggle his head and get warm soft baby cheek contact with his own, slightly older, warm baby cheek.

Two weeks into knowing him, ~G is not scary or other, and I don’t care if those I meet see his Down syndrome in him or not and I no longer feel the need to tell them. He just is and it is beautiful and exciting.

I am thankful for his apparent health (his heart is looking good, etc.), though I realize nothing is certain in this world and I am enjoying each new and special day with our family.

My favorite moments with him so far are late at night when our busy house is drowsy and quiet and ~G, tummy full, stares sleepily into my eyes and we see nothing but -each other.

Love, Love, Love,

~Lisa

 

 

 

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7 Responses to It’s a Baby!

  1. Thais Carvalho says:

    Love it! Conquering pre-conceived notions that gives us nothing but empty understanding. This little one will be teaching love lessons all around! <3

  2. Laura Peckham says:

    Lisa, I am so glad to read your update about Augustine and your family. All of your children have the wonderful comfort of two loving parents.

  3. Greg says:

    Thanks for sharing Lisa. I’m looking forward to meeting G.

    As for telling folks about Downs, I do tell people about Williams. Not that it need define my son, but it is unavoidable and new people are uncomfortable and overly cautious about what they can and can’t say or do around him. It’s easier just to share early that it’s a part of our life, and he isn’t made of glass. They can be themselves, because my son will be himself regardless.

    Still, I reject the idea that there’s a right answer, and it’s even okay if the answer even changes from time to time. Sometimes I feel it’s important to be an advocate, and sometimes it’s just time to take it easy and be a father and son, like any other.

    Best,

  4. Kelly Walker says:

    Beautiful update, Lisa. You are in my thoughts and prayers :) Love your last line… as a mother of now “more than one” I know how precious those one-on-one moments truly are. Sending Love your way!
    ~Kelly

  5. Colette Bythrow says:

    He is so beautiful and serene . I enjoyed reading about -G. The love we have for our children is insurmountable and I find peace as I read what you shared .

    Loves
    Colette

  6. Cathy Gourley says:

    Lisa-
    Hello “friend”. I hope you remember me….I have so many Elemental Memories pieces that you made of my sweet Jeb. I have thought of you often and checked in on your blog. I just read of the sweet birth of your latest precious boy. How handsome he is. Just wanted to send my congrats and tell you that although I don’t know you personally, I think G was gifted with a fabulous family. I can tell by your attitude that you ALL are blessed by this new addition to your family. I am a pediatric Speech-Language Pathologist that serves families like yours. I currently have a child with DS on my caseload and I can tell you he is the highlight of my day. My advice is to treat him as you did your other 5 sons. Please have no preconceived notions of what G can or cannot do! He is am amazing gift, just as all children are. You will ALL learn so much for each other! :)

    Blessings!

    • Lisa says:

      Cathy of course I remember you! Do you know I was just thinking of you the other day? Oh Cathy we’re going to have to meet one of these days. Thank you for your comments yes just like all the rest of my kids I don’t know who they’ll be when they grow up and the same goes for G. I can tell you that we all adore him, he was in the hospital for RSV for 4 days at three weeks old and came home on oxygen, but at two months we seem to be getting back on track. I’m so excited to have G as part of our family. Love to you and your family Cathy!

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