Our 6th son at 19 weeks. He is now 33 weeks and due to enter the world late Feb. 2013.

I watched It’s a Wonderful Life twice this Christmas season, once on Christmas Eve and then on the Epiphany as we packed away our ornaments and took down our tree.  I had never watched it fully through yet I had this inexplicable yearning for it this year.  Watching George Bailey struggle with the trajectory of his life through the many circumstances thrust upon him, his glimpse into life lived without him ever being born, and the final glorious realization that all his imperfect contributions really did culminate in a wonderful life, was well cathartic.

I wrote to a friend just the other day saying pretty much the following:  “It’s funny how comfortable I am becoming telling random folks about the new baby and his Down syndrome.  When someone asks if I know what sex the baby is I share that he’s a boy and then that we also found out he has Down syndrome.  There is often that moment of sympathy, but honestly it passes me by as I feel in my heart ready to meet him as God intended.

I am prayerful that I will feel this sense of confidence, sureness, and lack of sadness, when he comes.   It’s just fascinating how already this diagnosis is becoming just a “what is”, “not a big deal”, “just a part of life”.  I pray that feeling continues.”

I haven’t had any mystical visions into my past, present, or future, like George Bailey, but I do feel a ready heart for this new, beautiful, valuable life.  I can’t wait to welcome him home in celebration and begin to live, in full, our new normal.

~Lisa

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I know I was fairly fuzzy about the facts myself before we knew our family would include someone with an extra chromosome so if you are interested here is a pdf booklet for family and friends from www.downsyndromepregnancy.org that gives some great information about Down syndrome. (you can also scroll down this post for some bullet points on Down syndrome)

MEDICAL STATISTICS:

• 80% of all Down syndrome babies are born to women under 35 
• One in every 691 babies in the United States is born with Down syndrome.
• People with Down syndrome have an increased risk for certain medical conditions such as congenital heart defects, respiratory and hearing problems, Alzheimer’s disease, childhood leukemia, and thyroid conditions.
• Life expectancy for people with Down syndrome has increased dramatically in recent decades – from 25 in 1983 to 60 today.
• All people with Down syndrome experience cognitive delays, but the effect is usually mild to moderate and is not indicative of the many strengths and talents that each individual possesses. 

These statistics were taken from the National Down Syndrome Society website.

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Terminology

Here is a list of terms that are no longer used when referring to a person with Ds:

• Down syndrome child
• Down’s/Downs baby  
• Downsy
  
• He/she suffers from Down syndrome or is afflicted by Down syndrome (It is a diagnosis not a disease).
• Mental retardation (although medically acceptable, it’s social unacceptable)
• And of course… retard

List of terms that are used when referring to a person with Ds:

• A person with Down syndrome
• cognitive disability  
• cognitive impairment 
• intellectual impairment  
• intellectual disability
• developmental delay 

These terms can be found on the National Down Syndrome Society and the National Down Syndrome Congress website.                                              

~C picked this flower for me a week or two ago, before the cold set in and snow.  I love how kids adore dandelions and totally see them as flowers and not weeds.  I know I did when I was little, despite my father’s view that dandelions were pestilence in need of eradication from our lawn.

As an adult, I adore when they are freshly picked and lovingly given to me from one of my kids.  But I have to admit when placing them in a bud vase or small glass I cynically think, they are going to close up in 15 minutes and look dead and ugly.

Here it is though two weeks later, puffed up and beautiful on the kitchen sill overlooking our bright yellow playhouse.  It is magnificent, glorious, –transformed.  Anything but dead and ugly.

I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.  -John 12:24

I like to think of myself as that pretty yellow dandelion displayed with love in a little humble vase.  But I know that it’s only half the story, that the ugly Lisa underbelly has got to die, so I can be like that white dandelion transformed and ripe for sharing all the best parts of itself on the winds of grace…

Today was a lot.  Today I felt like a pregnant mom with 5 boys.

First there were two 9am dentist appointments.  Not just cleanings, but big stuff, a filling for one son and a tooth extraction for the other son.  There would be novicaine involved, and no nitrous oxide to ease things like our old dentist used.

I got up early to feel more prepared for this extra busy morning.  There was unexpected snow, an angry screaming preschooler out of sorts wanting daddy even though daddy already left for work, ~K mad and stompy about the two brothers that weren’t going to be on the bus with him because of their dentist appointments, scrambling to appease everyone, feed everyone, get the car warmed, the baby fed, diaper changed, dressed.  Then slippery roads, can’t make it in to drop the preschooler off at school safely, cars slip sliding all over the road.  A quick change in plans, ~R will just have to come with us too.

We make it to the dentist only 10 minutes late.  The two older boys go with their respective dental assistants as I play in the waiting room with my 4 yr old and 1 yr old, keeping them occupied and somewhat happy.  I chase ~O a dozen times as he toddles mischievously down the hall toward the exam rooms.

I pray, pray the two boys/patients will be ok and not scared or hurt during their procedures.  But I have to trust.  There is just only so much of me to go around.

Both boys come out about a half hour later, each with numb mouths, but they look ok and I am proud of them for doing it without me.  We get in the car and drive 20 minutes to drop one at one school and then the other at the other (where of course  ~R my 4 yr old wants to go to his preschool class, which isn’t going to happen because there is only an hour left and I am tired).  So more patience as I coax him out while holding ~O in my arms.  Promises of making chocolate chip cookies finally take hold of ~R’s imagination and and we make it back home.  Once there ~O takes a nap, I read to ~R and fall asleep in 5 minute snippets as he allows me to.

It has been a day where every child has taken from me in anger or in need and I have felt steadily pressed upon for something all day.

I am tired, I am weary,  I feel like a wilting dandelion sitting in a cup.

It is so hard to remember that on days like today, where I manage to give with grace, that I am closer to the white dandelion than the wilted, that in giving I am transformed.

Jesus does it so perfectly.  Man he is good.  It’s never about him, he gives in abundance.

I can’t say the same for me.

But I can get up each new day, sprout my bright yellow petals and try…

~L

The older boys have today and tomorrow off.  I love moments like this when they are engaged quietly together in some activity.  I couldn’t resist taking this photo earlier today when they were reading together through the Dungeons and Dragons book ~K got for his birthday.

I feel just so tremendously blessed to have them in my life and be mom to them.

The day is sure to be full of activity, running around, someone mad about something, someone else bored and needing redirecting, etc. but I value these small moments.  They just make life feel so full and beautiful.

~L